100% raw organic free-range heirloom variety local North Carolinian.

 

According to my mom, a skunk has dug up holes in her yard and found yellow jacket nests and eaten all the yellow jackets alive.

So now the skunk can spray you with stink and is also full of yellow jackets it can shoot at you.

How the Logic of "Friendzoning" Would Work If Applied in Other Instances:

*Man walks into a store and finds employee*

Man: Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!

Employee: Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?

Man: I never filled out an application.

Employee: Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.

Man: No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!

Employee: Well, but that doesn't-

Man: AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!

Employee: But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.

Man: OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!

Employee: Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?

Man: Well no, but what does that matter?

Employee: ...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.

Man: Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.

Employee: That...doesn't make any sense.

Man: NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.

Employee:

Man:

Employee:

Man: Fuck you, slut.

"To brown elbow with" is absolutely not a correct phrase.

1,225%

That’s how much the price of college in America has increased over the past 4 decades

That is not a typo. 

(via micdotcom)

In 1998 a quarter at a state school was $800 (when I first attempted college). When I finally got my shit together and graduated in 2010 it was $3300.

(via ipomoeaj)

Quinoa may deliver a complete protein—all of the amino acids you require—in a compact package, but rice and beans together actually do better. And like goji berries, blueberries and strawberries are packed with phytochemicals. The only problem is that lacking an exotic back story, food marketers can’t wring as exorbitant a markup from these staples: The domestic blueberry, for example, is periodically (and justifiably) marketed as a superfood, and in 2012, products featuring blueberries as a primary ingredient saw their sales nearly quadruple. But they only raked in $3.5 million—less than 2 percent of açaí-based product sales.

Tom Philpott, "Are Quinoa, Chia Seeds, and other ‘Superfoods’ a Scam?" (from Mother Jones)

Also worth highlighting is this section:

Worse than superfoods’ origin myths, though, are their effects on the people in their native regions. In 2009, at the height of the açaí berry hype, Bloomberg News reported that the fruit’s wholesale price had jumped 60-fold since the early 2000s, pricing the Amazonian villagers who rely on it out of the market. In the Andes, where quinoa has been cultivated since the time of the Incas, price spikes have turned a one-time staple into a luxury, and quinoa monocrops are crowding out the more sustainable traditional methods.” (emphasis mine)

So not only are the markets for “superfoods” putting the foods out of reach of the people who relied on them as a dietary staple, but there are foods easily accessible to us that deliver all the nutrition at a fraction of the cost, both to our grocery bill and to the social/environmental toll.

(via elenilote)

(Source: thalassarche)